Due to my interviewer freaking out during our last session, we had to reschedule our time and start over. This is part 2 of our interview.
Interviewer: Are we ready to try this again?
Me: Sure but no guarantees, you want a beer before we start?
I: It's 8:30 in the morning...you think you should be drinking?
M: I'm not sure.
I: I understand your first blog post references a friend who is writing a screenplay. How is that going?
M: I don't know. We don't talk about that anymore.
I: Oh? Trouble in blog paradise?
M: No. We both just have really short attention spans, if you couple that with almost no adult supervision you are left with the mess that is our collective thought process.
I: So, what do you talk about?
M: Different stuff.
I: Such as?
M: I promised I wouldn't say poop and pee.
I: OK Never mind then. Your blog post "I LUV MY JOB" talks about your work on the railroad, is that fulfilling?
M: I'm not sure "work" is an accurate description of my railroad job. I usually just sit and look out the window. And write blog posts.
I: So, would you be comfortable calling yourself an aspiring writer?
M: It depends on what I was doing when I called myself an aspiring writer.
I: I'm sorry, I don't follow.
M: Well, if I was sitting in my easy chair then yes, I would be comfortable. But, if I were say standing outside a burning building in the freezing cold wearing a shower curtain I would be uncomfortable.
I: The hell are you even talking about?
M: Sorry, I was trying to think of a very uncomfortable situation.
I: I should say so. Where did you come up with that scenario?
M: My blog-buddy Danica's blog.
I: I see.
M: It would also be very uncomfortable to be trapped in a haunted garage cubby hole.
I: Another blog reference?
M: Yes, from Spot's blog. Spooky stuff.
I: What would you do with a million dollars?
M: Probably build a big prodution set and create video blog posts spoofing tv movies and commercials. Then I would buy a really nice cape to wear to pbandtuna next year.
I: PB and Tuna?
M: LiLu's birthday party. Another blogger. Waaaay funny.
I: I shudder to think. So do you read several other blogs then?
M: Yes, they're listed in my "blogs I follow" area. There's a lot of talent here. Writers, artists, photographers, and comedians.
I: Your favorite?
M: All of them.
I: What was that look all about?
M: I just farted.
I: Thats it! We are done here. It's clear your main interest in life is goofing off, and making my life miserable.
M: Thats a fairly accurate observation but we just got started. I thought I might do some limmericks!
I: ABSOLUTELY NOT!
That's Where I Live
4 years ago
7 comments:
You vely funny guy.
I wasn't expecting that reference to my horror story when I began reading.
Was this interviewer of whom you speak a 'real - live' person? Imaginary friend? Alternate personality?
You can tell me, hunny - I got the market on crazy lately.
The "I farted." line totally got me. My first real giggle of the morning. Thanks for that! These posts have been some funny stuff. I think you're on to something here.
Thanks for the blog shout out. And I think we can all agree that Danica does not have the market on crazy. We all have our own little niche.
♥Spot
Danica, That was one of the worst situations I have heard lately. I just made up the whole interviewer guy or gal?
Spot, You surely knew there would be a bodily function reference in there somewhere. Glad you giggled and didn't get coffee out the nose.
OMG. You give one GREAT interview....and you just couldn't stay away from the bodily functions, eh?
So, did you ever get that beer? 'Cause I really think that interviewer was waaaay out of line, telling you the time, and all.
You say "almost" no adult supervision. Does this mean occasionally someone keeps an eye on you? 'Cause you couldn't PAY me enough for that job.
Seriously. Where's my beer?
Trust me, you will never get another interview if you stink your first interviewer out! (they talk you know...)
You are writing a screenplay? Really? Boy, there is just so much about Mark we don't know. I think you should finish it, direct it and star in it. Hey if Tom Cruise can do it...
Just be sure you keep bloggin' because PEE, you know, is a hot topic and we seem to have the resident expert right here. (Tell us about blockage.)
Well thank you Kathryn for that idea and the compliment. Trust me no beer is safe when I'm around. And I will always share them. Adult is Lovely wife she keeps me in check...not!
Cynica whereever have u been? I'm not writing a screenplay, my friend is. I'm more of a ...consultant. yeah thats it. Blockage? do you reeeeeally want me to go there? I thought not. :)
I know that "I just farted" face. B wears it whenever we enter an enclosed space together. MEN.
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