Today I'm thinking about luck. Who's lucky? Who's unlucky? What does it even mean to be "lucky"? I don't think it is a set in stone thing like, this happened so...pow... you're lucky. No I think maybe there are lucky events in ones life.
Take my buddy Ken for example. Ken likes to gamble at the casinos and he wins loot a good part of the time...thats lucky. I know though, that last summer his truck was broke down for a time. Kind of unlucky. Me, I always lose dough at the casino, but I have a really pretty wife to offset my pain. So I'm lucky that way. I'm not sure what the odds are for any given event, I mean, what kind of a number describes "random"? I don't know.
I do know that yesterday at Quik Trip, Ken won $100 on a $5 scratch ticket. Meanwhile, I was outside pumping gas and getting stung by a bee. So I called my pretty wife to tell her about it (whine like a little girl) and she was very supportive and encouraging. She told me I was probably stung due to the fact that I am sweet, like a beautiful flower. RIGHT, THANKS WIFE!
So there I sat pondering my sweetness when something new occured to me prompting my second call to the wife. "Honey", says I, "what if I am allergic to bees?" "No way" she told me, "you wouldn't be able to call me cause you would be all gasping for air and swelling up by now." GREAT I thought. So began my wait for an agonizing, choking, swelled up death.
5 minutes later I noticed I was still breathing so I decided to call my friend Brock. "Hey, what should I do? I got stung by a bee." His reply?..."Get someone to suck out the poison."
I just hung up. I am not going to waste my last few minutes on earth talking to some guy who can't tell rattlesnakes from honeybees!
So there I sat waiting, and wondering...AM I LUCKY?
Turns out I guess I am lucky. I didn't keel over from my bee sting, however it would have been a lot easier and less painful to find that out by winning $100.
From One Mother, to Another
8 months ago
6 comments:
Huh ... interesting you mention bees ... I had to evict two bees from my livingroom yesterday afternoon. They were barely moving (I presume because it is freezing cold here) but there they were ... in my livingroom.
Nobody was stung.
Consider yourself the lucky one, since the bee would have flown off to die shortly thereafter.
:)
I'd rather have the $100 but you should consider yourself lucky that the bee didn't come back and sting you again!
Danica, I knew he would be dead soon and I feel a little bad about it. (I have read some stuff about bees and find them very interesting)
But he did sting me for no reason, (ok maybe I shooed him away once) and thus should be punished. Was funny because I haven't been stung since I was a little kid. It was kind of like falling down, as a kid its no big deal but as an adult I find falling down is very weird. This post didn't come out nearly as funny as I thought it would. I have a backup post ready for later though.
Heather, honeybees can only sting once, then they die. I wonder if they take that into consideration when they sting someone...OK this is my one shot I gotta make it count! Silly bees if I only had one shot I would go for the heart or the eyes. Thanks for reading! :)
This is so funny! (Ever notice how one man's traumatic event is another woman's comic relief?) I think you should consider your little bee sting a very lucky event. Not only should you feel ultra special that the bee chose YOU to die for, but also because apparently, Very Pretty Wife cares deeply enough for your sweet self to put up with you screaming like a girl in her ear. Twice. She even said you were sweet! (How long have you guys been married?)
As for Brock, I'm sure his camping buddies have a hoot hanging with him out in the woods. "Help me Brock! I got a bee sting!" "Where?" "Right here, inside the leg of my
shorts!" Me thinks Brock needs some basic First Aid training. (Get your buddy, Ken, to pay for it- )
We have bumblebees around here, so they can sting as many times as they like! Little blighters.
Loved the bit about a sting feeling like falling down! Too funny. I've only been stung once - by a wasp - a couple of years ago and it was only because it got stuck under my bra strap. It was a minor irritation. Unfortunately, the poor thing was squished to death. That'll teach the little perv!
Thank you for your lovely comment on my blog. I hope to stop by here often.
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